đź’” Can Love Survive Betrayal? How Gottman-Based Therapy Helps Couples Rebuild After Infidelity
By: Dr. Jenn M.G.
Infidelity shakes the very core of a relationship. The pain, confusion, and sense of betrayal can feel overwhelming—for both partners. Yet, as impossible as it may seem in the moment, many couples not only survive infidelity… they come out stronger.
As a clinical psychologist trained in the Gottman Method, I help couples navigate the rocky terrain of betrayal with structure, compassion, and evidence-based tools.
đź’¬ The Aftermath of Infidelity: What Couples Face
Infidelity often opens the floodgates to emotional flooding, blame, and shutdown. One partner may be desperately seeking answers and reassurance. The other may be drowning in guilt, shame, or defensiveness. It's a fragile space—one that needs more than just good intentions to heal.
This is where the Gottman Method can be life-changing.
🧠The Gottman Approach to Healing
Based on over four decades of research with thousands of couples, Drs. John and Julie Gottman developed a model that guides partners through both prevention and repair.
When it comes to recovering from infidelity, the Gottman Method focuses on three critical phases:
Atone: Creating space for honest, empathetic dialogue. This is where the hurt partner needs to ask questions and express pain, and the offending partner listens, takes responsibility, and commits to transparency and change.
Attune: Rebuilding emotional connection. This stage focuses on understanding each other’s inner worlds, rebuilding trust, and strengthening the friendship at the heart of the relationship.
Attach: Rekindling intimacy and creating new meaning. It’s not about returning to “how things were”—it’s about creating a new foundation for a future together.
🛠️ What We Work On in Therapy
Managing conflict without escalation
Re-establishing trust and boundaries
Understanding what led to the infidelity—not to excuse, but to gain insight
Coping with triggers and emotional flashbacks
Rebuilding intimacy—physically, emotionally, and sexually
Creating rituals of connection that support ongoing growth
đź’ˇ A Note of Hope
Healing from infidelity is not a quick fix. It takes time, courage, and vulnerability. But with the right support, couples can transform rupture into resilience. Therapy is not about assigning blame—it’s about creating a new path forward, together.
If you and your partner are in the aftermath of betrayal and don’t know where to start, you’re not alone—and you don’t have to do this alone.
đź“ž Reach out today to begin the healing process with structured, compassionate support. Rebuilding is possible.